Still learning

Looks like I needn’t have worried about temptation today. My body had other plans.
Be still day.
This used to be what I would call one of my M.E “bad” days. I wake up feeling like I’ve had no sleep or rather reverse sleep. That is, every minute asleep has drained me further.
Sometimes a bit of yoga and and some hot lemon and raw apple cider vinegar is enough to restart the battery but other times no deal. My veins feel like someone has sneaked in and replaced the blood with liquid lead and any form of exercise is extremely taxing. I don’t want to sleep but staying awake becomes equally tricky.
Today was a little bit like that. I was, thankfully, able to do some chores and a bit of pottering around the house but with lots of rests in between. Concentrating on websites was a no-no. The ZX spectrum processing power wouldn’t allow for that.

So my body has taken over. I am so thankful it does that. When the wisdom in my brain eludes me or I have chosen to ignore it, my body puts on the breaks and tells me “Be still”. I don’t fight it now, I listen and then I fall into the stillness.

Looking back over my week I see why. My balance has been off. Too much time and energy at and on work work. In fact therein lies the message. Doubling the word is giving it too much power in my life, too much focus. It needs to take a supporting role, energise not drain and be less of a diva.

From now on “work” is on its lonesome.

Published by Kirstie Sivapalan

Writer. Poet. Indie Kid. Crystal Lady. Pisces. Enthuser. Cheerleader. Helper. Geordie Londoner. Sharer of stuff I know. Sometimes found working in HR (but not very often) Oh, and #spoonie, living with ME/CFS. That about covers it.

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