Only love

No poem or funny story for you. Just some thoughts and a plan…

It’s been a difficult week

Less

By Thursday the combination of the confirmation of that individual as leader of the Conservative Party, which supposedly makes him my PM, the way above average or even peak temperature that day and M.E symptoms were threatening to pull me under.

By Friday I felt listless, useless and helpless.

Less.

So, today, I have decided to do something about it – something to heal my soul and prevent the bitterness and despair from seeping in.

I have been following Oprah and Deepak’s 21 day meditation and am a day behind. Today’s centering thought was

I use my energy to heal and transform”

Except I had not been using my energy to do anything of the sort. At all. Instead I was becoming increasingly angry and frustrated by the antics and actions of both that individual here and the one over there. Exactly as expected, as hoped. As planned?

This was neither healing nor transformational energy.

Counterbalance

Hate, fear and anger cannot be countered with hate, fear and anger. The words of Martin Luther King say it best.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness;only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

By being full of hate the only result I was getting was more hate. I needed to counter with love. Only love can do that.

I am not saying I can change the world with thoughts and acts of love (if we can we can but I’ll leave that one to the mystics) but what I can do is counter the hate in myself, and transform hate to love, fear to hope and anger to joy, with acts of love, compassion and kindness.

And oh do I have to try. Oh Gods and Goddesses do I have to try. I have to aspire to this, allow as much love in as I can, to create the world I want to see within me, to have the slightest chance of creating the world without.

So my plan, because I do like a plan, and a list and to tick things off my list, is to do at least one thing every time I see a post, a tweet, a news article designed to trigger, everytime I have a horrible thought or a dream, every time I forget and spread the hate, fear or anger, I am going to counter with an act of love, hope or joy. Or all three. And I am going to write them down and share them. Not because I want people to think I am doing a good thing but to hold myself to account.

To take responsibility for my soul. Not yours. Not theirs. Just mine. In a way that I know how.

By balancing the scales.

You can too, should you wish to. Maybe you already are, and if so, and I would love to hear more. Maybe there are a few of us thinking the same thing? Maybe you gave me the push I needed.

And that’s amazing.

Published by Kirstie Sivapalan

Writer. Poet. Indie Kid. Crystal Lady. Pisces. Enthuser. Cheerleader. Helper. Geordie Londoner. Sharer of stuff I know. Sometimes found working in HR (but not very often) Oh, and #spoonie, living with ME/CFS. That about covers it.

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